Friday, July 15, 2005

One of those typical cheap humours, but really enjoyable.

Thursday, July 14, 2005

A really funny anectode from A small history of briefly everything.
Context: 19th century : In their eagerness to reject the idea of our simian descent, authorities were often willing to embrace the most singular possibilities.

An anthropologist, puzzing over Neandertha's heavy brow ridge, suggested that it was the result of long-term frowning arising from a poorly healed forearm fracture.


Creationists are crazy. This friend of mine, Shyaam is, in my opinion, a die-hard creationist, though not the Let there be light type.A few years back, I was impressed by his interesting advaita philosophy and almost converted.

This guy refused to believe in dinosaur bones, and kept questioning the truth behind them - You see the bones, but not the animal. Who knows how this ended up here. And anyways, it is not a scientifically proven fact. Lots of scientists still disagree!.

'Ya, the creationist scientists in kansas probably disagree. But virtualy everybody else agrees

But how can you prove that they existed. They might just be maya

Cirsumstantial evidence

Same is the case with belief in god

At this point, I gave up and decided to watch DDLJ
My transitive friend* found out that she's pregnant and hence elated, on top of the world and all the usual crap that goes along with this state. She even wrote a mail to her friends informing the much expected, happy and exciting news of her pregnancy and how she is looking forward to this.

I don't understand people's excitement over children, particularly the woman's, considering the fact that she has to experience the excrutiating pain of child-birth to give birth to something as ridiculous and as mindnumbingly dumb and uninteresting thing as a child. Not that I prefer adoption, for, I despise children. Given a choice, I'd prefer to take my chance at being eaten alive by a hyena.

It's amazing what conditioning can do to people's logic, be in in religion or in child-birth. As a friend of mine described it, it is as painful as pulling a nail from your finger, only that you get a child instead of a nail-less finger

*friend of friend :)

Wednesday, July 13, 2005

Yahoo! goes Chaiya Chaiya

Malaika Arora in the new brand ambassador for Yahoo! India mail. Read this.

P.S: An attempt at TOI-style captions, and I must say - this is TOI standard :)

Tuesday, July 12, 2005

What's up...

In addition to Mallika Sherawat's MMS clip, AP govt's Volkswagon parody, a german granny retiring from active prostitution at 63, I've been reading A short story of nearly everything that gives interesting and often funny anectodes on the quest for knowledge, and a very interesting theory called the Aquatic ape theory that proposes that humans once had semi-aquatic ancestors.

If you have a 12 year-old niece/nephew and would like to encourage scientific curiosity, I would suggest that you do things

  • Give him/her a copy of A short story of nearly everything, or better, Carl Sagan's Cosmos, and

  • Explain the importance of promiscuity.

Even if the first point doesn't excite him/her, the second surely will.

Carl Sagan's Pale Blue Dot clearly makes him an AYM-GRAMD, but as the old redneck saying goes - a little AYM-GRAMD don't hurt nobody.


Train journey from Bangalore to Delhi : 52 hours Rs.1500.
Air Deccan : 2.5 hours Rs. 4200.

You would expect that the people who pay 4k for travel would have well-established concepts of decency and etiquettes. Please don't.

P.S: Is there a place in India where sex toys are sold? Would love to shock people out of their skulls.

Monday, July 11, 2005

This boy
just made a fool of himself. He thought he did a wise thing in retaining whatever was left of his dignity. Guess he realised what he has done :)

If only!

Early morning Bangalore

Its not every morning that you wake up with a lusttful dream, atleast not when you are 24, or atleast not when you are me :)

Was grinning from ear to ear and opened my eyes, when for a second, I wasn't able to see. Overcome with panic, I frantically groped for my cell only to realise that I had not gone blind, but my cheeks are covering my eyes. 'Tis time for some exercise.

I have no problems in women wearing salwar kameez, draping themselves with a dupatta and walking slowly and gracefully in public parks, but will someone tell them that this is not quite the best approach to jog?

JP3 and my cousin's wedding....

In a major outburst, my mom declared that I am a social misfit and a freak whose ideals(lol) aren't practical. Why? because I refused to visit my relatives and when I got to know that one of my relatives is getting engaged, I refused to wish him.

This cousin of mine went to Trichy for a demeaning ceremony called Pon paarkum padalam. In short, he was one of those jerks who think that they can get married to a woman by seeing how she looks, and to an extent, her culinary skills, and who believe that the only point in getting married is to get laid. Coming back to the point, the girl was the 16th in a long line of pointless beings, being the product of extremely horny parents who never understood the concept of contraception, be it natural or otherwise. And the cousin's mom claims that she doesn't want dowry, but asks for 100g gold. If you aren't a desi, all this might sound strange to you, but this is what happens. And to top it all, aroung 10 people went to approve the girl and deem her good enough to get married to.

By the end of this conversation with my mom, I was laughing my ass off, and passed a few remarks that should have sounded to her as being highly caustic, and hence the tirade.

Anyways, what's more important is this - a screenshot of the fight between a tryrannosaurus rex and a spinosaurus.

This was a scene in Jurassic Park 3, a movie renowned for its highly unscientific potrayal of dinosaurs - talking velociraptors, pteranodon with teeth, claim that raptors were the most intelligent of all dinosaurs... and the list goes on...

Anyways, enjoy the fight.

Sunday, July 10, 2005

This and that...

Much as I hate Nilu's Been there, done it rant, by no means do I disgree. It should be fascinating to see someone go through similar thought processes as you did in the past.

I am tired of life, the slow dawdling montonous struggle against nothing, and more importantly, for nothing. Have given up the will to survive, there is nothing, absolutely nothing to prevent me from pulling a trigger and blowing my goddamned brains out. Nothing, except my unsurmountable inertia.

Don't mistake me, for I am not depressed. I don't despise the world. (Actually I do, but it has nothing to do with this). I love my job, have a relationship, flirt with people who I have a crush on( and realised that she too has a crush on me), watch awesome movies, occasionally get drunk - sometimes on vodka, and mostly on my own remarkable thought processes, jerk off often, take pride in being a narcissist, slaughter chicken, have a nice time with all my friends. In short, I lead a perfect existence and have no reason at all to be tired of life.

But the fact is, I am. I am tired of losing all I ever hoped to be. It is difficult to wake up every morning to see that you are fighting a losing battle against inertia. It is difficult to digest the fact that though I can quit my job whenever I want for no reason but to prove myself a point, but I won't. I can't, and it kills me, especially given the fact that this inertia is not systemic.

I am tired of realisng everyday that I won't be the knowledge-accumulator that I always wanted to be. I won't crawl on the mountains of Montana, collecting oviraptor boans, never live thriftily on my meagre income that I get for cleaning particle accelerators, never ..

All my life, I have believed that the singular purpose of life is to increase one's knowledge, and nothing more. Now that I have discoved that I am not going to do that, I might as well blow my brains out. Gun, anyone?

Thursday, July 07, 2005

Dino joke

A priest, a rabbi and a stegosaurus walk into a bar...

Well, forget it :)
Everything is in slow-motion today. Every action, from a keystroke to a coffee gives me an impression of wading through a highly viscous medium. Scratching my ear takes a minute, logic stinks and memory fails.

Guess my inertia is trying to kill itself.

Wednesday, July 06, 2005

Indian Aviation Industry

I think the indian aviation industry will bite the dust soon enough due to one simple reason - lack of runways.

This is actually funny, but this is what happened - at least, this is what i gather, had happened. Was seated in an air deccan flight(slightly uncomfortable seats, i must say), and we were all set to take off. The pilot had the runway in sight, and was steadily accelerating towards the runway - it was just a turn ahead when, bang, all of a sudden an indian airlines flight made a sharp turn and occupied the runway. The air deccan pilot had to idly run around for half an hour before the runway was cleared for take off.

It was atrociously funny. Look at the things people have to put up for cheap air tickets :)

Friday, July 01, 2005

Lost in translation - part 3

A marriage invitation that i received this morning says:

Myself getting married with [bride] on [date] in [Place],India.
We request the pleasure of your company.
Come, celebrate with us.


Don't these people have a conscience?