Sunday, April 30, 2006

When will indians ever learn to mourn? It's disgusting to see women huddled, flaying their sweaty bodies around and crying their hearts out with sadness - a little for themselves and a little for others, and men standing in a corner covering their mouths with unwashed towels, carefully avoiding each others' gazes in the hope that it won't be their turn next.

P.S: Reason for angst: The awesome pteronodon picture went unnoticed.

List of people that I don't hate

Finally, I've come up with the list of people that I don't hate. Here it is:


Crap... Mission aborted.


Saturday, April 29, 2006

New blogger template

Spent three hours on this. Tell me if you like the new template or if I should go back to the old one.

Friday, April 28, 2006

'In the end,' said Alice, 'everything is as logical or illogical as everything else.'

Spoken like a true Alice :)

Thursday, April 27, 2006

Dinosaur of the day

Deinonychus antirrhopus skull
Originally uploaded by mojosaurus.
Deinonychus antirrhopus.

Need I say anything more?

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Lost in translation... from English to English... (recycled)

Since I am in an angst mode and all such kind of stuff, it would do the world much good to read one of the recycled posts

I sometimes can't help but wonder the fate that would befall poor Lynne Truss if she ever finds her way to the desi land.
Not only does she have to tolerate the spineless pandering of a typical desi, but worse, listen to grammatically incorrect flavour of whatever is left of English in this land. And if fate has it that she meets a techie in the vicinity of bangalore who makes sure that s/he rolls every R, but is quite oblivious to the other mistakes that gush forth at the rate of 3 grammatical and 2 semantic mistakes per sentence with liberal sprinklings of hindi/tamil all over the place, she would be tempted perpertate much more than a symbolic act of defiance with a permanent marker, and would probablyl go on to throw up all over the place.

If the liberal use of apostrophes can drive a person crazy, sentence constructs can drive him over the edge, steal an XM-29, and happily pump round after round of bullets blindly in random directions, and once the ammo runs out, proceed to buy another pack and empty them too.

A popular outlet in Bangalore says:
Latest fashion dresses for men's women's boy's and girl's
And for God's sake, it wasn't even an undergarments outlet.

A leisurely walk along Hosur Road would have driven out the British faster than the Mahatma, who unfortunately, was a stickler.

Side sing Package trip to Ooty, Kodai, Mysore and Coorg
No, this is not a safari of the tribal heartlands of Kodai and Ooty where tribals line up on the either sides of the road to sing a soulful song on thier favourite two-headed dog-demon that kills innocent unwary tribals, and no, it is not the pot they smoke before killing snakes, though you might actually end up buying it. It is not a courier service either, as the package trip might suggest. What the board means by wisely tearing out superfluous letters is that they offer packaged tours for sight seeing. Parsimony at its best, I would say.

Further down the road, right next to the real estate agents who also rent out VCD's and DVD's, past several hotels that surprisingly don't provide lodging, and offer interesting dishes on the lines of Spinach omlet and Mashroom Manjuri, you would see a board that reads in bold letters

Child cutting done here

You pass out for a second, regain consciousness, shake your head in disbelief, rub your eyes just in case, see the board and promptly faint again. You are brought back to reality by the bakery owner next door who incidentally sells Cocanet balls and explains that it is a barber shop and they give children a haircut here. Relieved, you ask for a soft drink to bring down your heart rate. The shop owner gives you a look that is usually reserved for 25 year old men who run down the road screaming out loud that there is a tyrannosaurus rex in his underpants. You say 'Pepsi' and his face promptly brightens up and he exclaims, Ah, cooling, sir!.

You finally get a feeling that there are a few things that you don't understand, and the term cooling is one of them. If science can't explain cooling, there isn't much that you can trust science with. The shopkeeper then smiles, extends his hands and says

Myself Pandey sir, Dayal Pandey

Who is Myself Pandey here? you ask, after looking around to confirm that there are only two people in the vicinity. You are yourself, fine!; he is Dayal Pandey, great! but where is this Myself Pandey? You bend and look under the table to see if you can find this elusive Myself Pandey.

No, he isn't there. Quite a strange name for a person- a reflexive/emphatic substitute for a name. Interesting! So thinking, you go on to finish your pepsi. But Dayal Pandey is not amused.

You are comedy sir. Mein Dayal Pandey hoon, myself

You couldn't stop the violent spasm that makes you splash the remaining pepsi on the walls of the shop. Between the frightful coughs you also find time to wonder what makes you a comedy!

At this moment, your survival instincts take over. You suddenly don't want to stand near a shop that indulges in paedicide and to talk to a reflexively referring individual. You grope for your purse, pay him and rush out. As you come out of the shop, your eyes happen to notice that they sell Grill Sandwhich, shudder and run for your life.

P.S: Also serves as a pointer to those who want to write posts on "spelling mistakes", if you know what i mean :D

Tags: ,
Summer + traffic + bad lane discipline == Existential angst.

Buggers don't know to stick to their goddamned lane!!!!

Tags: ,

Bug G hates me

Gmail talk not enabled, and I use firefox. Sucks

Tuesday, April 25, 2006


"I'm feeling down", he said. "I feel like singing I'm looking through you, you're not the same", take an andean trek, live among the amish, burn the world down and take you along with it".

He said, "I am reminded of the poem

She believes if she could only overtake
The riding rhythm of things,
Of her own electrons,
Then she would be at rest
If she could forget school,
Climb the tree,
Be the tree,
Burn like that.

He said "I want to be the she, I want to be the tree, I want to burn like the tree, like her".

He said "I'm in the pack's-last-condom, DDLJ-induced nostalgia".

He said much more, on and on.

And she said "I understand", and he froze.

He wanted to shout out "But you don't. You think you know, you want to know, but you don't. I won't let you know".

But he didn't. And he was happy.

Those crazy buggers - The Beatles

If you consider LSD was cool, read this:

This excerpt is from Pete Shotton's excellent book 'The Beatles, Lennon And Me' (originally published as "John Lennon In My Life", 1983, Stein and Day Publishers :

From page 217:

"One afternoon, while taking "lucky dips" into the day's sack of fan mail, John, much to both our amusement, chanced to pull out a letter from a student at Quarry Bank. Following the usual expressions of adoration, this lad revealed that his literature master was playing Beatles songs in class; after the boys all took their turns analyzing the lyrics, the teacher would weigh in with his own interpretation of what the Beatles were really talking about. (This, of course, was the same institution of learning whose headmaster had summed up young Lennon's prospects with the words: "This boy is bound to fail.") "John and I howled in laughter over the absurdity of it all. "Pete," he said, "what's that 'Dead Dog's Eye' song we used to sing when we were at Quarry Bank?" I thought for a moment and it all came back to me: Yellow matter custard, green slop pie, All mixed together with a dead dog's eye, Slap it on a butty, ten foot thick, Then wash it all down with a cup of cold sick.

"That's it!" said John. "Fantastic!" He found a pen commenved scribbling: "Yellow matter custard dripping from a dead dog's eye....". "The Walrus" came from Alice in Wonderland.

"Let the fuckers work THAT one out", said John.

Monday, April 24, 2006

Just how did dinosaurs walk?

Humanity's fascination with theropod dinosaurs continues with scientists trying to model how huge theropods like tyrannosaurus rex would've walked. Here's a study, courtesy New York Times.

This is one reason why palaeontolgy is so goddamned fasciating - the ceasless speculations. On a related note, Darren Nash, a vertebrate palaeontologist put forward a speculation that azhdarchids, that includes giants like the Quetzalcoatlus were actually giant storks.

Well, I don't subscribe to his theory, the reasons for which will be explained in a subsequent post.

For now, enjoy the images :)

Taxon search for archosaurs

Perfect way to kill time when you're behind schedule

Truth does not have to be accepted on faith. Scientists do not hold hands every Sunday, singing, "Yes gravity is real! I will have faith! I will be strong! Amen."

-- Dan Barker

மலபார் மாமா

அம்மி சாக் பாட்டு

அம்மீடர் ஷாக் அடிக்குது, அம்மாடி
வோள்ட்டு மீட்டர் ஷாக் அடிக்குது

For those that can't read the strange script, understand that the tile goes Malabar mama, followed by a very raunchy item number about a lecturer and a student in the physics lab, with numerous suggestive lines about ammeters and voltmeters.

Was reminded of this incident that happened way back in twelfth standard.

மலபார் மாமா

அம்மி சாக் பாட்டு

அம்மீடர் ஷாக் அடிக்குது, அம்மாடி
வோள்ட்டு மீட்டர் ஷாக் அடிக்குது

For those that can't read the strange script, understand that the tile goes Malabar mama, followed by a very raunchy item number about a lecturer and a student in the physics lab, with numerous suggestive lines about ammeters and voltmeters.

Was reminded of this incident that happened way back in twelfth standard.

Saturday, April 22, 2006

It's disheartening to realise that throwing yourself life headlong into tragedy is a universal phenomenon.

People, why would you want to do that??

My uber-cool desktop

Click the image

My uber-cool desktop
Originally uploaded by justbecos.
After a frustrating hack day at work, when your ineptitude with javascript makes you want to curse the lecturers in college and your intuition that client-side intelligence is an anti-pattern, I realised that it's time for a makeover.

And what better way to than a utahraptor-windowmaker theme :)

Thursday, April 20, 2006

Disambiguate: Boredom kills more zebras than mosquitoes.

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Web 2.whatever

Remember Chinni Jayanth's satires on T.Rajendar? Well, this one is slightly better.

Overuse of javascript & browser-side intelligence used to be an anti-pattern not too long ago. Things do change, don't they


Evolution of snakes

Najash rionegrina is the name given to the fossils of what seems to be the most primitive snake yet found, a two-legged, land-based creature with obvious roots in its lizard-like ancestors, probably those monitor lizard thingies that include the komodo dragon.

What's missing here is the skull of the najash. Should be extremely interesting to compare it to extant snake species

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

The days are getting longer

I knew it. It wasn't just the summer or my depression. The days are indeed longer than they were when I was a child.

When my geography teachertaught us about tides, she didn't tell us that the moon slows down the rate of rotation of the earth, and that the moon itself is moving away from the earth. You might say - But that's obvious, but it isn't to a person who spoke his first words when he was three and a half creating widespread fear of dementia in the family circles.

Imagine, we won't have complete solar eclipses is a couple of deka million years.

This is how big the moon would've looked in the Precambrian era.

For more information, see this.

Since the Earth spins faster than the Moon moves around it, the tidal bulges are dragged along with the Earth's surface faster than the Moon moves, and move "in front of the Moon". Because of this, the Earth's gravitational pull on the Moon has a component in the Moon's "forward" direction with respect to its orbit. This component of the gravitational forces between the two bodies acts like a torque on the Earth's rotation, and transfers angular momentum and rotational energy from the Earth's spin to the Moon's orbital movement.

Because the Moon is accelerated in forward direction, it moves to a higher orbit. As a result, the distance between the Earth and Moon increases, and the Earth's spin slows down. Measurements reveal that the Moon's distance to the Earth increases by 38 mm per year (lunar laser ranging experiments with laser reflectors are used to determine this). Atomic clocks also show that the Earth's day lengthens by about 15 microseconds (µs) every year.

Monday, April 17, 2006


"Whoa" said the last troodon, and "boom" went the asteroid over chicxulub.

As the impact shock ripped off the last of its feathers, it saw a furry smelly Didelphodon scurrying underground, and then, the world went blank.

Chapter 3 - How unbelievably sucky mammals are
"Rabies, hair and nipples - Rise of the suckers(mammals)" - Ishwar.

Caffeine-induced punctuated disorientation

Sunday, April 16, 2006

I know as much about the immigration debate as you people(or most of you atleast) know about ceratopsid sex life, but what strikes me as atrotiously hilarious is that the illegal immigratants taking offence at the use of the word illegal immigrants, saying that it demeans their illegal immigrant community.

What next? Bank robbers refusing to be called bank robbers? Should you call them marginalised victims who seek redistributive justice?

Dear dumbfucks, QoTD

Dumbfucks, missing links aren't nature's secret army that spring up once in a goddamned while to fill in quantum leaps.

Evolution is a bloody continuous(ok, punctuated continuity) process and nature isn't waiting for you to fill in the hopes. Missing link only implies that we haven't found it YET.

Friday, April 14, 2006

The ultra-cool Yahoo! mail beta


Click on the image for more details

Multiple compose tabs, drag-drop, Subject-O-Matique, RSS Feed.. Mindblowing...

Goodbye, gmail.

P.S: Click on the image and look at the image notes on flickr :)

Thursday, April 13, 2006

What am I doing in office on friday morning on a long weekend?

Legends of speak of this amazing creature called life, and how it makes long weekends particularly bearable. Am trying to find that creature.

If you haven't already, make sure that you lay your hands on the strings only version on Eleanor Rigby, Beatles.

They grow 'em big in Texas

Mark Witton's commentary

They grow 'em big in Texas
Originally uploaded by Mark Witton.
One thing not really coveyed in most pictures of Quetzalcaotlus is just how big the damn thing is, so I've mocked up this diagram just to make the point. The manly silouhette in this picture is meant to be of average height for a male human (about 1.85 m or so), demonstrating that the shoulder height of this pterosaur is some 2.5 m off the floor with a neck 3.5 m long and a skull exceeding 2 m in length. That's pretty large for any animal, let alone for one that could fly. Although this Texan pterosaur is large, other azhdarchid remains from Spain and Jordan indicate even bigger animals. Gosh.

IQ and the Wealth of Nations

I wonder how the ever-patriotic zealous desis would react to this.


Read recently

This pulitzer-winning book tries to explain the reasons being Eurasian(specifically european) dominance[in a very subjective fashion] over the rest of the world, to paraphrase the author, on Why europeans conquered americas, and not the other way round.

The book tries to explain why humans in different parts of the world moved from a hunter-gatherer lifestyle to a settled lifestyle, and how this does not, by any means, stem from racial or cultural differences, but due to the environment. Defintely worth a read.

Just read

This book talks about the coming of intellect of a dinosaurian species somewhere beyond the stars. The first book of the trilogy that talks about a dinosaurian galileo, and how he tries to instill science into a nascent dinosaurian civilisation that still hasn't let go of its primodal instincts.

Reading these books one after the other makes you wonder if a territorial predatory species will evolve intelligence.

Next in line

Wednesday, April 12, 2006

The best thing about the recent change of loyalty from velociraptors to utahraptors is that it doesn't involve a change in my blog name - Life, Raptoral atavism and everything. I could've changed loyalty to Deinonychus, or for that matter, to any member of Dromaeosauridae, and the blog's name would've remained the same.


Tuesday, April 11, 2006

So, what's your state fossil?

Alabama has its own basilosaurus,
California, the sabre tooth

Coelephysis graces New Mexico
Nebraska has way too many to go

The mighty New York ironically
has Eurypterus
Tamil Nadu has an arbit stegosaurus
So, what's your state fossil?

For the want of purpose

Four centuries after a man was accused and imprisoned on charges of heresy for refuting geocentrism, the world is still afraid of science and those that believe in science.

Was chatting with a friend, and he gave me an impression that he was a theist because it gave him some purpose in life

(15:08:38) xyz: but in eternity, where does our 100 year life stand? whats the point of our meaningless struggles/happinesses
(15:08:50) Ishwar: nothing, there is no point to anything
(15:08:52) xyz: we can as well commit suicide
(15:09:06) Ishwar: yes, we might as well commit suicide
(15:09:14) xyz: if we dont believe in spirituality, thats the only hope of life
(15:09:17) Ishwar: the only point o f life is to propagate itself through one's own genes
(15:09:29) xyz: propagate itself and?
(15:09:33) Ishwar: that's it
(15:09:37) Ishwar: there is no purpose to life
(15:09:45) Ishwar: why should there be a purpose at all
(15:09:47) xyz: and? what significance does it have in eternity
(15:10:12) Ishwar: according to me "purpose" is the invention of a feeble human mind trying to come to terms with it's futile existence
(15:10:14) xyz: there should be a point man
(15:10:23) Ishwar: why should there be?
(15:10:57) Ishwar: because our parents told us so?
(15:11:25) Ishwar: our parents also told us that eclipses are caused by snakes swallowing each other
(15:11:36) Ishwar: not just parents, our mythology says so
(15:11:51) xyz: aaaahhhhh true though
(15:11:53) Ishwar: well, when they can be wrong there, why can't they be wrong about philosophy?

And so on..

Please note(Sundar, this is for you) that the argument is by no means deductive reasoning.

Of course, I can be wrong here. Probably there is a purpose to life. But seriously, when geocentrism is proved to be false, and when we know that earth is an insignificant little planet revolving around a yellow little sun in the outer reaches of the spiral arms of an unremarkable old galaxy in the middle of nowhere, the purpose somehow eludes me :)

P.S: Hope the friend doesn't mind my posting the conversation.
Iran has enriched uranium, illegal burritos get citizenship, vaiko joins amma, the beatles are dead and my landlord laid down a new driveway. With so many things changing, I think it's time I made the most important switch of my life.

Ladies and gentlemen, let me introduce to you, the Utahraptor.

The largets member of the Dromaeosauridae family that includes the velociraptors, a 2.5 metre tall biped carnivore weighing about 800kgs with a 25 cm long claw on each of its legs and capable of speeds upto 50kmph.

This is an old reconstruction attempt, from the Walking with dinosaurs series. Try imagining her with feathers.
She's awesome, isn't she?
There are a few fish species in a couple of lakes in Nicaragua or Panama or


A and E can interbreed. All other combinations can't.

Wonder how this is the case...

Source: Dinosaur mailing list

Monday, April 10, 2006

Ze reservation debate

I'm not a fan of redistributive justice. But then, I'm not a member of the Human Resource Ministry either. Fair deal.

Was watching the episode on the 49% reservation debate on We, the people,NDTV. What was pretty obvious was the lack of belief in redistributive justice among most of the participants, and a kind of sick desperation, without logic, at saving one's own piece of ass.

Those arguing for meritocracy fail to realise that meritocracy works only on a level battle-field. Arguments like We give you reservation, and ..... People, go back and hear yourself speak. And then, give me two reasons why I shouldn't feel that I should've born as a dinosaur.
A couple of days back, my friend had pinged me this URL that talks about the Adam's bridge between India and Sri Lanka, and drawing parallels with hindu mythology. Here's an excerpt from the article.

The legends as well as Archeological studies reveal that the first signs of human inhabitants in Sri Lanka date back to the a primitive age, about 1,750,000 years ago and the bridge's age is also almost equivalent. This information is a crucial aspect for an insight into the mysterious legend called Ramayana, which was supposed to have taken place in tretha yuga (more than 1,700,000 years ago).

Let us ignore the irritating , if not pointless beginning argument put forward in the beginning of the page, and instead move on to the scientific aspect.

Point 1: Homo Sapiens evolved 200,000 years back from Homo Erectus.
Point 2: 1.75 million years back, we only had Homo Erectus and Homo Habilis, and neither of these species was in Asia.
Point 3: The earliest hominid settlements in Asia(with the current archeological evidences) are only about 500,000 years back.

Accpeted, none of this implies that there was no human intelligence 1.75 million years back, but then the species that Rama belonged to couldn't have been Homo Sapiens. And gosh, imagine what it takes for two species to obtain the same morphological characterisitics.

Well, what can I say!

Source Pharyngula

Za blogger

Source: Pearls.

Sunday, April 09, 2006

Indian summer

Mercury soaring
libidos falling...

makes you wonder
how does human species
have aquaris and pisces...

Life, or something like that - 11

Life 101: Never fall for a person who is way above your league. You'll never be able to figure out what hurts more - the kick or realisation of your league.

The person remains, the opinions don't.

About a year back, I had this to say.

I am opinions personified - i wonder if there is anything that i don't have an opinion about. Being a self-proclaimed atheist, sceptic, misomundist, misanthropist(on and off), misogregist, misophilist, misogaboorist, and miso-antaksharist among others, i wonder if i can be any other way...

The person remains, the opinions don't. What remains are tasteless remains of opinions; like odourless sulphur; having no reasons to exist. An opinion must impose its weight. A weak opinion is like a storm on an airless moon.

Am going in search of these lost opinions, in search of some wind back in my life.

Saturday, April 08, 2006

Fishes and reptiles undulate sideways
whales and dolphins up and down
and humans sink down
all the way down

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

Human tragedy doesn't get the rich accolades it deserves; personal tragedy lesser so. It feels like a perpetual hyper-caffeined beatles song.

Life is never as real as it is in a tragedy; the view is never as focussed, the pain is never as acute, the smells are never as evocative, the sounds never less immaterial. You never love someone as much as you do when you hate them; a funny tuft of hair never as much an object of focussed disgust; a single line in a song never as varied and a mosquito never as annoying.

And the posts are never as good :)

Monday, April 03, 2006

Itchy ears from hours of listening to the same song, itchy fingers-the keyboard; itchy memorires- sticky little memories in a row. Look at how they sing- the memories, like a rusty carnatic singer, pouring out tunes from rote.

Sex and the long-haired biped mammal with an enormous cerebral cavity

Coming soon...

Wednesday morning - recycled

One of my personal favourites, recycled.

0825 on an unusally warm wednesay morning. Eyes still closed, I wake up to the feeling of a miniature birth of time.

Nothing existed before now, before this moment of awakening light, no sound, no memories... and nothing shall exist before i open my eyes. For a few precious moments, I was THE universe, in all its entirety, the non-existent universe outside waited patiently for it's birth.

Nothing seems to matter. I can continue to lie still, and the universe won't exist. An hour, a day or for as long as i wish. Or i can choose not to breathe, and suffocate the foetal universe.

Tiny tentacles of memory, greenish-purple in colour start reaching out from under the placid sea of my serene universe, threatening to puddle my nascent non-existing universe into non-existence. Hazy wisps of events begin to take shape, like collapsing swirls of cosmic dust, unable to convince gravity stating their meagre mass.. helpless... inevitable... The shapes are already discernable... inevitable...

I can remember last night... the blinding orgasm, and i smile thinking of the brilliance of evolution... the exponential path spent in thinking of the other person, and at the moment of climax- nothing... only you...

The climax dispels the remaining clouds.. dispels the very dust that makes up my universe-the dust that shields me from facing the real world. All of a sudden, I hear the faint distant hum of the fan, the suffocating warmth of my quilt and smell my unwashed pillow cover... inevitable...

The world existed inspite of my closed eyes. The universe pored through my eyelids to mock at me., and I woke up.

'Gosh, not one of those philosophical days' so saying, I woke up to face Wednesay

Sunday, April 02, 2006

Way too cool is an understatement

Knoll, F., P. M. Galton & R. Lopez-Antonanzas. 2006.
Paleoneurological evidence against a proboscis in the sauropod
dinosaur _Diplodocus_. Geobios 39 (2): 215-221.

"The dinosaur Diplodocus has a single, relatively large external bony
narial orifice that is positioned far back between the orbits. In
some mammals, such as elephants and tapirs, the caudal position of
the narial opening is associated with a proboscis, so it has been
suggested that Diplodocus possibly also had a trunk."

Now, beat that!
My biggest turn-off is a woman who passively accepts society's sexism under the guise of practicality, family, compassion and understanding.

Is it only or does everybody feel like you just swallowed a slimy eel whole when you watch the latest Aishwarya Rai coca cola advertisement?

Saturday, April 01, 2006

If I were the Big Brother

1. I'd outlaw the use of words "adorable" and "cute". Thought spies strategically placed at various positions in the city will track down and categorically eliminitate all people who use these words, in a long-drawn capital painful process of capital punishment.

The rest will follow.