Wanted: A loaded grenade launcher and an auto stand
I am pissed off, fuming, angry and exhausted. I wish that all the auto drivers in Madras drop dead and all potential auto drivers die of colon cancer. Those who survive the colon cancer, get bone marrow cancer and die a very painful death.
One auto-driver gave a moving story of oppression and the subsequent fight-back. More about this later.
My cousin is getting married, and the groom's family has asked for a huge dowry, and worse, my cousin's family is giving it. I feel like going to the marriage and puking on the dias. But then, I choose not to care
Internet Cafes in madras have this annoying policy of asking you to remove your footwear before entering the shop.
Sunday, October 30, 2005
Friday, October 28, 2005
A Story with a Moral
A well-known (animal) behavioural psychiatrist once conducted an experiment to understand the extent and impact of social co-operation.
He had seven monkeys in a cage. All the monkeys were well-behaved, toilet-trained, god-fearing, educated, moralistic, mylapore, sorry mozambique-born monkeys. The cage was two metres high and tied to the ceiling was a juicy banana.
Everytime one of the monkeys tried to reach the banana, all the monkeys were drenced in cold water by an external observer. Soon, the monkeys learnt that whenever you try to reach out for something up there, you get drenched, and whenever one of them tries to get smart, the others pulled him down, and soon none of the monkeys reached for the fruits above.
One day, one of the monkeys was replaced by a new monkey, and the water-thrower was fired. But, as expected, when this monkey tried to reach for the banana, everybody else pulled him down. Now, our new monkey did not know why, but in time, he got used to it.
Slowly, over time, the seven original inhabitants of the cage were replaced with the new monkeys and none of the monkeys let the others reach for higher things, even though they did not know why.
We all know the monkeys, don't we!
Source: Sundar
Time for dino lessons.
He had seven monkeys in a cage. All the monkeys were well-behaved, toilet-trained, god-fearing, educated, moralistic, mylapore, sorry mozambique-born monkeys. The cage was two metres high and tied to the ceiling was a juicy banana.
Everytime one of the monkeys tried to reach the banana, all the monkeys were drenced in cold water by an external observer. Soon, the monkeys learnt that whenever you try to reach out for something up there, you get drenched, and whenever one of them tries to get smart, the others pulled him down, and soon none of the monkeys reached for the fruits above.
One day, one of the monkeys was replaced by a new monkey, and the water-thrower was fired. But, as expected, when this monkey tried to reach for the banana, everybody else pulled him down. Now, our new monkey did not know why, but in time, he got used to it.
Slowly, over time, the seven original inhabitants of the cage were replaced with the new monkeys and none of the monkeys let the others reach for higher things, even though they did not know why.
We all know the monkeys, don't we!
Source: Sundar
Time for dino lessons.
Gallimimus
Meaning - Chicken-mimic. One of the most intelligent dinosaurs, and certainly one of the fastest
I wonder if it was as tasty.
Struthiomimus
Meaning Ostrich mimic
Nothing remarkable. The image shows a profile-comparison of an ostrich and a struthiomimus
Ornithomimus
Meaning Bird mimic.
Thursday, October 27, 2005
Mylapore and penguins' sexual orientation
Sullivan mocks humanity's imposition of anthropo-centric morals on animal behaviour.
The keepers at Berlin’s Bremerhaven zoo were frustrated for years wondering why their penguin couples weren’t producing any eggs. After DNA testing they discovered that three of the five pairs had the avian equivalent of “civil partnerships”.
No word yet on progress. But German gay groups were outraged. How dare the zoo try to reprogram gays? “The central question is, are our penguins really gay or is it simply a lack of opportunity?” the zoo keeper told Der Spiegel. “The males have had the opportunity but haven’t done it.”
In New York’s Central Park zoo, a gay penguin marriage has even become literature. Roy and Silo were two male penguins who showed no interest in the females, appeared devoted to each other, built a nest together and at one point even found a pebble they decided to sit on.
On a related note, at the pterodactyl's house last night, I saw the the much-acclaimed Jungle book.Probably the best in the animated movies genre, after Ice Age and Hishomita, a japanese animated porn.
The keepers at Berlin’s Bremerhaven zoo were frustrated for years wondering why their penguin couples weren’t producing any eggs. After DNA testing they discovered that three of the five pairs had the avian equivalent of “civil partnerships”.
No word yet on progress. But German gay groups were outraged. How dare the zoo try to reprogram gays? “The central question is, are our penguins really gay or is it simply a lack of opportunity?” the zoo keeper told Der Spiegel. “The males have had the opportunity but haven’t done it.”
In New York’s Central Park zoo, a gay penguin marriage has even become literature. Roy and Silo were two male penguins who showed no interest in the females, appeared devoted to each other, built a nest together and at one point even found a pebble they decided to sit on.
On a related note, at the pterodactyl's house last night, I saw the the much-acclaimed Jungle book.Probably the best in the animated movies genre, after Ice Age and Hishomita, a japanese animated porn.
Last night, on my way back home, I happened to overhear this conversation
Ponna karai ethittu, paiyanu foreign-ukku amichutta namma kadamai mudinjadhu.
This man still hasn't understood human beings. Such a pity.
Ponna karai ethittu, paiyanu foreign-ukku amichutta namma kadamai mudinjadhu.
This man still hasn't understood human beings. Such a pity.
Wednesday, October 26, 2005
Invoke Führer, and lose the battle
One reason why I like the online world is because of the huge amount of free porn. Other reasons include dinosaurs and the fact that you can scorn at somebody online without seeing the other person's reaction.
Somewhere along the line comes the fact that the online world is so much unlike the real world.
"So, what's it like in the real world? Well, the food is better, but
beyond that, I don't recommend it." - Bill Waterson
Personally, I don't agree with Bill. There is food, and there is sex. Other than that, I don't recommend the real world either.
Godwin's law is one example why the online world is so goddamned fascinating.
Godwin's law (also Godwin's rule of Nazi analogies) is an adage in Internet culture that was originated by Mike Godwin in 1990. The law states that:
As an online discussion grows longer, the probability of a comparison involving Nazis or Hitler approaches 1.
There is a tradition in many Usenet newsgroups that once such a comparison is made, the thread is over, and whoever mentioned the Nazis has automatically lost whatever argument was in progress. Godwin's law thus practically guarantees the existence of an upper bound on thread length in those groups. Many people understand Godwin's law to mean this, although (as is clear from the statement of the law above) this is not the original formulation.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Godwin's_law
Somewhere along the line comes the fact that the online world is so much unlike the real world.
"So, what's it like in the real world? Well, the food is better, but
beyond that, I don't recommend it." - Bill Waterson
Personally, I don't agree with Bill. There is food, and there is sex. Other than that, I don't recommend the real world either.
Godwin's law is one example why the online world is so goddamned fascinating.
Godwin's law (also Godwin's rule of Nazi analogies) is an adage in Internet culture that was originated by Mike Godwin in 1990. The law states that:
As an online discussion grows longer, the probability of a comparison involving Nazis or Hitler approaches 1.
There is a tradition in many Usenet newsgroups that once such a comparison is made, the thread is over, and whoever mentioned the Nazis has automatically lost whatever argument was in progress. Godwin's law thus practically guarantees the existence of an upper bound on thread length in those groups. Many people understand Godwin's law to mean this, although (as is clear from the statement of the law above) this is not the original formulation.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Godwin's_law
In search of the elusive indian root.
It is "finding the roots" time again. Every year in November, India goes mad searching its roots. Men, women and children from all parts of the country single-mindedly throw themselves at the noble cause of root-digging.
Today is ethnic-wear day in my company, and someone composed a poem that says
Let's get back to our roots
We are all Indian offshoots
Sounds creepy to me.
Every year people find their roots in November only to lose it again. And the hunt spills over to the next year.
Today is ethnic-wear day in my company, and someone composed a poem that says
Let's get back to our roots
We are all Indian offshoots
Sounds creepy to me.
Every year people find their roots in November only to lose it again. And the hunt spills over to the next year.
Kid's play
My friend's daughter turned three last week, and her dad gave her a few books on dinosaurs. Despite my in-toto aversion to kids, I was amazed when she claimed that she was a pterodactyl and went on to let out a barrage of dinosaur species names, a few of which I never knew existed.
Man, I am impressed, considering the fact that my first words were appa, amma, when I was three!
Man, I am impressed, considering the fact that my first words were appa, amma, when I was three!
Tuesday, October 25, 2005
Bangalore biological reserve
This was on Old Madras road after yesterday's rains.
This guy has acquired interesting skills.
Nuke Myalapore Campaign - II
Nuke Mylapore
Many many people have questioned my rationale behind my nuking mylapore. I strongly feel that an act as benevolent as this one doesn't need reasoning. Like Kamal said in Nayakan - Naalu perukku nalladhu nadandha thappillai. Who are the four people - me, and there would be three more people for sure.
If this reason isn't good enough, here are a few more:
- The sheer capillary-mindedness of most of the mylaporeans
- Such capillary-minded people's views on what is right and what is wrong makes me puke all over their cultured asses. Over time, I have come to make a generalisation, a false one at that, that mylaporeans are a bunch of prude, cynical, pot-bellied people who take pride in their pot-bellied genetically-restrictriced pedigree. So? sue me!
Now, that isn't fair. Most mylaporeans I know are cheerful young liberals, a tad too idealistic, but very very agreeable.
I grew up in Mambalam, a lower-middle class water-starved tambram locality united by moderate povertyof the eighties, and I hated the rich snobs from Mylapore, especially those that went for tennis classes and swimming classes in summer. Those high society children from P.S. Senior secondary school who used to talk about the cricket coaching classes in school were my childhood's bete noire The clean sweeping roads where children played cricket with tennis balls in mylapore were in sharp contrast to the narrow, dirty and crowded lanes where i played with rubber balls.
Gradually, after sporting interests gave way to more prurient adolescent pursuits, my obsessive hatred of tennis-ball clad mylapore bourgeoiese faded away to obscurity, i.e. until recently
The conservative views of an uneducated man from Tanjavur on culture, philosophy and life are understandable(no condescension here).The same views coming from an educated 40 year old mama makes you wonder if these things are for real.
Monday, October 24, 2005
Outlook on IIPM
Outlook has published an article about the recent IIPM-desi blogosphere spat, taking a condescending view of the immature blogging community.
The Indian blogging community (or blogosphere, as it likes to call itself) is essentially a bitchy, self-indulgent and an almost incestuous network comprising journalists, wannabe-writers and a massive army of geeks who give vent to their creative ambitions on the internet. Given that the average blogger-age is 25 years, it's clear bloggers love to indulge in hearty name-calling and taking college-style potshots at others. This is probably why some of them get into trouble.
1. I think the writer needs to take a course on basic journalism. He seems to be reporting exactly what he sees and hears. That's not journalism.
2. What he says about the desi blogging community is right. It is a self-indulgent army consisting mostly of people with an IQ of 3.
The Indian blogging community (or blogosphere, as it likes to call itself) is essentially a bitchy, self-indulgent and an almost incestuous network comprising journalists, wannabe-writers and a massive army of geeks who give vent to their creative ambitions on the internet. Given that the average blogger-age is 25 years, it's clear bloggers love to indulge in hearty name-calling and taking college-style potshots at others. This is probably why some of them get into trouble.
1. I think the writer needs to take a course on basic journalism. He seems to be reporting exactly what he sees and hears. That's not journalism.
2. What he says about the desi blogging community is right. It is a self-indulgent army consisting mostly of people with an IQ of 3.
Barkha Dutt and me - 2
My crush on Barkha Dutt went up a couple of notches after yesterday's "We, the people", (though it is still quite close my opinion of visu's arattai arangam).
The issue in contention was the ethics/pragmaticity of surrogate parenthood. The participants ranged from a religiously deranged father who raised one the only good point in the whole show. This point notwithstanding, the show was overrun by morality-obsessed hordes who think this is still 1609 and that women should be brought up/treated differently.
The show was centred on a 46-year old single man who chose a surrogate mother to bear him a child. The point that I wanted to make was that despite all these arguments, Barkha Dutt punched a kilometre-wide hole on the participants' faces for being sexists and not appreciating it when a man takes up the responsibility of parenthood.
I know a few people who would feel that way.
The issue in contention was the ethics/pragmaticity of surrogate parenthood. The participants ranged from a religiously deranged father who raised one the only good point in the whole show. This point notwithstanding, the show was overrun by morality-obsessed hordes who think this is still 1609 and that women should be brought up/treated differently.
The show was centred on a 46-year old single man who chose a surrogate mother to bear him a child. The point that I wanted to make was that despite all these arguments, Barkha Dutt punched a kilometre-wide hole on the participants' faces for being sexists and not appreciating it when a man takes up the responsibility of parenthood.
I know a few people who would feel that way.
Sunday, October 23, 2005
Given that I come from this college which boasts of perhaps the most uninteresting set of women ever(the men were even more uninteresting, but I was never interested in their being interesting), it is surprising that I still retained the ability to find women interesting after I graduated.
Now, don't get me wrong. I am as rabidly anti-sexist as they come. But when the most interesting conversation that you can have with anyone stops with asking where they come from, and when the women insist on addressing you with honorifics(neenga, vaanga or aap) and they be addressed without honorifics, I guess I didn't have much choice.
Anyways, what is surprising is the sheer impact that various women had on my life in the last eight years.
Now, don't get me wrong. I am as rabidly anti-sexist as they come. But when the most interesting conversation that you can have with anyone stops with asking where they come from, and when the women insist on addressing you with honorifics(neenga, vaanga or aap) and they be addressed without honorifics, I guess I didn't have much choice.
Anyways, what is surprising is the sheer impact that various women had on my life in the last eight years.
Barkha Dutt and me
My crush on NDTV's Barkha Dutt is waning fast. "We the people" is now on par with the million pointless humourless pattimandrams on tamil tv channels, perhaps a little more polished.
The linguo-pyschic divide
Over the last few years, I've come to realise that there is something fundamentally different between a tamil psyche and a hindi psyche.
To make it short and crisp, tamil psyche doesn't know how to live. It still thinks that living in with 5 more friends in a cramped house without a TV and, what would otherwise be called ameneties, but here, called luxuries like a television, is fun. It thinks 40 times before spending 100Rs, and thinks that a good way to have fun when you are 25 is to hang out with 10 more 25-year old men and exchange dirty jokes.
I have a message for you - go drench yourself, and get a life.
P.S: Definitely not directed at anybody.
To make it short and crisp, tamil psyche doesn't know how to live. It still thinks that living in with 5 more friends in a cramped house without a TV and, what would otherwise be called ameneties, but here, called luxuries like a television, is fun. It thinks 40 times before spending 100Rs, and thinks that a good way to have fun when you are 25 is to hang out with 10 more 25-year old men and exchange dirty jokes.
I have a message for you - go drench yourself, and get a life.
P.S: Definitely not directed at anybody.
Wednesday, October 19, 2005
How dumb can people get anyway?
I don't understand why creationist have to adopt this cool-scientifically-inclinded-stupid-dude attritude when it comes to evolution. Why can't they stick to their dogma in a way that befits dogma - being inanely dogmatic. Why should they to explain dinosaurs and fossils and make a bigger fool of themselves.
I hate utopians. Ceratopsians, yes. Utopians, no. These morons claim that all animals before the flood were herbivores - it was a perfect world, you see.
Stupidest Argument ever
Could it be that tyrannosaurs were mostly plant-eaters, not meat-eaters? The shape of their teeth alone can't tell us what they ate. Perhaps they used their sharp teeth and claws to tear up tough plants and fruits, not dinosaurs. Obviously sharp teeth can serve other purposes than simply cutting meat, just as kitchen knives can be used for cutting carrots as well as steaks.
It is surprising that humanity still survives. Thankfully, we don't have such faggots teaching us science in schools.
I hate utopians. Ceratopsians, yes. Utopians, no. These morons claim that all animals before the flood were herbivores - it was a perfect world, you see.
Stupidest Argument ever
Could it be that tyrannosaurs were mostly plant-eaters, not meat-eaters? The shape of their teeth alone can't tell us what they ate. Perhaps they used their sharp teeth and claws to tear up tough plants and fruits, not dinosaurs. Obviously sharp teeth can serve other purposes than simply cutting meat, just as kitchen knives can be used for cutting carrots as well as steaks.
It is surprising that humanity still survives. Thankfully, we don't have such faggots teaching us science in schools.
Hitchhiker's guide to ending up ossfieid
Posted this a long time, and to this day has been one of my most favourite posts.
Been a fancy idea of mine for a long time- ending up as a fossil, and being recovered a billion years from now by an intelligent species evolved from rodents, humans having been wiped out long bac by an epidemic.
Looks like i am not w/o company
What is the best method to fossilize my remains when I die?
After my death I would like to become a fossil. Is there anything I could have done to my remains that would improve my chances, and where would be a good place to have them interred? How quickly could I turn into a fossil?
D. J. Thompson London, UK
So you want to become a fossil? This is admirable, but you have made a bad start. A hard, mineralised exoskeleton and a marine lifestyle would have given you a better chance. But let's start with what you have got: an internal skeleton and some soft outer bits.
You can usually forget the soft bits. If you take up mountaineering or skiing and end up in a glacier crevasse you could become a wizened mummy, but that's not real fossilisation, just putting things on hold for a while. If you really want to survive the ravages of geological time then you need to concentrate on teeth and bones. Fossilisation of these involves additional mineralisation, so you might want to get a head start and think about your diet: cheese and milk would build up your bone calcium. And look after your teeth, as these really are your best bet for a long-term future. So get a good dentist and keep those appointments.
After that it comes down to three things: location, location, location. You must find a place to die where you won't be disturbed for a long time. Caves have worked well for some people, so you might want to take up potholing to scout out locations close to home, but get the proper training.
Alternatively, you need a rapid burial. I don't mean a speedy funeral service picked out of the telephone directory, but something natural and dramatic - the sort of thing that is preceded by a distant volcanic rumble and an unfinished query along the lines of "What was...?"
You might want to travel to find the right natural opportunity. Camping in a desert wadi in the flash-flood season would be good. And long walks across tropical river flood plains during heavy rain could get you where you want to be: buried in fine, anoxic mud. Or how about an imprudent picnic on the flanks of an active volcano? But take geological advice because you are looking for a nice ash-fall burial, not cremation by lava.
Talking of picnics, fossil stomach contents can provide useful palaeo-diet information, so a solid final meal would be good. And I mean solid. Pizzas or hamburgers won't last, but shellfish or fruit with large seeds (you will need to swallow these) could intrigue future scientists.
Finally, trace fossils (marks in rocks that indicate animal behaviour) are always welcome. So a neat set of footprints leading to your final location would be good. Use a nice even gait with no hopping or skipping to confuse analysis of how you really moved.
Of course, you have more chance of winning the lottery than ending up as a fossil. But if you do go for a place in the fossil record please keep in touch. Geologists are always on the lookout for interesting new specimens, so let us know where you'll be. We can arrange to dig you up in, say, a million years. D. J. Thompson London, UK
So you want to become a fossil? This is admirable, but you have made a bad start. A hard, mineralised exoskeleton and a marine lifestyle would have given you a better chance. But let's start with what you have got: an internal skeleton and some soft outer bits.
You can usually forget the soft bits. If you take up mountaineering or skiing and end up in a glacier crevasse you could become a wizened mummy, but that's not real fossilisation, just putting things on hold for a while. If you really want to survive the ravages of geological time then you need to concentrate on teeth and bones. Fossilisation of these involves additional mineralisation, so you might want to get a head start and think about your diet: cheese and milk would build up your bone calcium. And look after your teeth, as these really are your best bet for a long-term future. So get a good dentist and keep those appointments.
After that it comes down to three things: location, location, location. You must find a place to die where you won't be disturbed for a long time. Caves have worked well for some people, so you might want to take up potholing to scout out locations close to home, but get the proper training.
Alternatively, you need a rapid burial. I don't mean a speedy funeral service picked out of the telephone directory, but something natural and dramatic - the sort of thing that is preceded by a distant volcanic rumble and an unfinished query along the lines of "What was...?"
You might want to travel to find the right natural opportunity. Camping in a desert wadi in the flash-flood season would be good. And long walks across tropical river flood plains during heavy rain could get you where you want to be: buried in fine, anoxic mud. Or how about an imprudent picnic on the flanks of an active volcano? But take geological advice because you are looking for a nice ash-fall burial, not cremation by lava.
Talking of picnics, fossil stomach contents can provide useful palaeo-diet information, so a solid final meal would be good. And I mean solid. Pizzas or hamburgers won't last, but shellfish or fruit with large seeds (you will need to swallow these) could intrigue future scientists.
Finally, trace fossils (marks in rocks that indicate animal behaviour) are always welcome. So a neat set of footprints leading to your final location would be good. Use a nice even gait with no hopping or skipping to confuse analysis of how you really moved.
Of course, you have more chance of winning the lottery than ending up as a fossil. But if you do go for a place in the fossil record please keep in touch. Geologists are always on the lookout for interesting new specimens, so let us know where you'll be. We can arrange to dig you up in, say, a million years.
Been a fancy idea of mine for a long time- ending up as a fossil, and being recovered a billion years from now by an intelligent species evolved from rodents, humans having been wiped out long bac by an epidemic.
Looks like i am not w/o company
What is the best method to fossilize my remains when I die?
After my death I would like to become a fossil. Is there anything I could have done to my remains that would improve my chances, and where would be a good place to have them interred? How quickly could I turn into a fossil?
D. J. Thompson London, UK
So you want to become a fossil? This is admirable, but you have made a bad start. A hard, mineralised exoskeleton and a marine lifestyle would have given you a better chance. But let's start with what you have got: an internal skeleton and some soft outer bits.
You can usually forget the soft bits. If you take up mountaineering or skiing and end up in a glacier crevasse you could become a wizened mummy, but that's not real fossilisation, just putting things on hold for a while. If you really want to survive the ravages of geological time then you need to concentrate on teeth and bones. Fossilisation of these involves additional mineralisation, so you might want to get a head start and think about your diet: cheese and milk would build up your bone calcium. And look after your teeth, as these really are your best bet for a long-term future. So get a good dentist and keep those appointments.
After that it comes down to three things: location, location, location. You must find a place to die where you won't be disturbed for a long time. Caves have worked well for some people, so you might want to take up potholing to scout out locations close to home, but get the proper training.
Alternatively, you need a rapid burial. I don't mean a speedy funeral service picked out of the telephone directory, but something natural and dramatic - the sort of thing that is preceded by a distant volcanic rumble and an unfinished query along the lines of "What was...?"
You might want to travel to find the right natural opportunity. Camping in a desert wadi in the flash-flood season would be good. And long walks across tropical river flood plains during heavy rain could get you where you want to be: buried in fine, anoxic mud. Or how about an imprudent picnic on the flanks of an active volcano? But take geological advice because you are looking for a nice ash-fall burial, not cremation by lava.
Talking of picnics, fossil stomach contents can provide useful palaeo-diet information, so a solid final meal would be good. And I mean solid. Pizzas or hamburgers won't last, but shellfish or fruit with large seeds (you will need to swallow these) could intrigue future scientists.
Finally, trace fossils (marks in rocks that indicate animal behaviour) are always welcome. So a neat set of footprints leading to your final location would be good. Use a nice even gait with no hopping or skipping to confuse analysis of how you really moved.
Of course, you have more chance of winning the lottery than ending up as a fossil. But if you do go for a place in the fossil record please keep in touch. Geologists are always on the lookout for interesting new specimens, so let us know where you'll be. We can arrange to dig you up in, say, a million years. D. J. Thompson London, UK
So you want to become a fossil? This is admirable, but you have made a bad start. A hard, mineralised exoskeleton and a marine lifestyle would have given you a better chance. But let's start with what you have got: an internal skeleton and some soft outer bits.
You can usually forget the soft bits. If you take up mountaineering or skiing and end up in a glacier crevasse you could become a wizened mummy, but that's not real fossilisation, just putting things on hold for a while. If you really want to survive the ravages of geological time then you need to concentrate on teeth and bones. Fossilisation of these involves additional mineralisation, so you might want to get a head start and think about your diet: cheese and milk would build up your bone calcium. And look after your teeth, as these really are your best bet for a long-term future. So get a good dentist and keep those appointments.
After that it comes down to three things: location, location, location. You must find a place to die where you won't be disturbed for a long time. Caves have worked well for some people, so you might want to take up potholing to scout out locations close to home, but get the proper training.
Alternatively, you need a rapid burial. I don't mean a speedy funeral service picked out of the telephone directory, but something natural and dramatic - the sort of thing that is preceded by a distant volcanic rumble and an unfinished query along the lines of "What was...?"
You might want to travel to find the right natural opportunity. Camping in a desert wadi in the flash-flood season would be good. And long walks across tropical river flood plains during heavy rain could get you where you want to be: buried in fine, anoxic mud. Or how about an imprudent picnic on the flanks of an active volcano? But take geological advice because you are looking for a nice ash-fall burial, not cremation by lava.
Talking of picnics, fossil stomach contents can provide useful palaeo-diet information, so a solid final meal would be good. And I mean solid. Pizzas or hamburgers won't last, but shellfish or fruit with large seeds (you will need to swallow these) could intrigue future scientists.
Finally, trace fossils (marks in rocks that indicate animal behaviour) are always welcome. So a neat set of footprints leading to your final location would be good. Use a nice even gait with no hopping or skipping to confuse analysis of how you really moved.
Of course, you have more chance of winning the lottery than ending up as a fossil. But if you do go for a place in the fossil record please keep in touch. Geologists are always on the lookout for interesting new specimens, so let us know where you'll be. We can arrange to dig you up in, say, a million years.
Tuesday, October 18, 2005
Swimming dino
What's this hoopla about swimming dinosaurs anyway? It isn't as if you have captured a live dinosaur swimming leisurely in Lake Titicaca when the Bolivian Navy was in training*
I mean, all reptiles swim, all crocodiles swim and all birds swim. So, what's the big deal about a dinosaur swimming?
*Trivia: Bolivia is a now land-locked nation in South America, but it wasn't always so. It lost a lot of territory to Chile during the
War of the Pacific
. Even today, the Bolivian navy is has its training camps on Lake Titicaca, in preparation for the future takeover.
I mean, all reptiles swim, all crocodiles swim and all birds swim. So, what's the big deal about a dinosaur swimming?
*Trivia: Bolivia is a now land-locked nation in South America, but it wasn't always so. It lost a lot of territory to Chile during the
War of the Pacific
. Even today, the Bolivian navy is has its training camps on Lake Titicaca, in preparation for the future takeover.
Monday, October 17, 2005
Life, or something like it- 7
An unbelievable fraction of my life in the last one year or so has been about one person... so much so that i suppose, subconsiously, i cared a damn about the rest of the world. am not going to weigh the consequences, and am not going to debate the reasons... whatever they are,i enjoyed it to the core and am happy...
realised this as i have to go to the hospital today to dress my stitches, and am stranded with nobody to take me to the hospital as she is busy with one of her spic macay orientations, and i dont feel like asking anybody else...
I posted this in September 2004 when I had an accident, am surprised that I didn't realise the obvious then.
Life has strange ways of masking the obvious and projecting the trivialties.
A really awesome drawing of a baby tyrannosaurus
Sunday, October 16, 2005
Saturday, October 15, 2005
How I wish the mesozoic girl was here. An irresistable urge to shock people has overwhelmed me. Tried it on my mom, but no, she stoically refused to be shocked. Tried it on my colleague last night and his reaction was a condescending smirk.
In my opinion, the mesozoic girl is an ideal candidate for shock therapy.
In my opinion, the mesozoic girl is an ideal candidate for shock therapy.
Friday, October 14, 2005
Thursday, October 13, 2005
Hindi in the south - 2
And this is a slightly more readable version of the same board. Guess this was written after a lot of people complained that there was no board in hindi, and that the existing boards have instructions written in English, Tamil and Swahili.
BTW, a genuine doubt - what could this actually be - joote rakhne ka jagah?
BTW, a genuine doubt - what could this actually be - joote rakhne ka jagah?
Hindi in the south - 1
This strange language in an unfamiliar script is what you get after the anti-hindi agitations finally lost its meaning and the hindi language was grudgingly accepted by the dravidian movement.
This photo was taken outside the Chidambaram temple and is obviously meant to help tourists from the north. I must say that it does a pretty good job at that.
This photo was taken outside the Chidambaram temple and is obviously meant to help tourists from the north. I must say that it does a pretty good job at that.
For every rupee spent, Bangalore gives you the worst standard of living of all the cities that I've seen.
Not so long ago, I loved this city. I loved the shady roads, the awesome weather, the ubiquitous Iyengar Bakery and the near-non-moving pace of life. All that changed when I couldn't get a steaming hot cup of coffee at 10:30 pm.
Suddenly, I could see the million potholes, the non-existent road sense, ludicrous rents, the irritating wannabes, and almost everything else.
I think I should go to sleep now.
Not so long ago, I loved this city. I loved the shady roads, the awesome weather, the ubiquitous Iyengar Bakery and the near-non-moving pace of life. All that changed when I couldn't get a steaming hot cup of coffee at 10:30 pm.
Suddenly, I could see the million potholes, the non-existent road sense, ludicrous rents, the irritating wannabes, and almost everything else.
I think I should go to sleep now.
Wednesday, October 12, 2005
Evolution rocks -2
Continuing this, Michael Crichton stooped to the level of Luis Llosa(of Anaconda fame), and competed with Anaconda in the number of factual errors.
You bring back a species that has been extinct for 65 million years and one that has brains the size of a potato, and bang - there they are, opening doors with hands.
Factual error1: Velocirapors are therapods, closely related to modern birds and their shoulder joins allow only one type of movement of limbs - sideways, like that of a bird. Not up and down, the way that one opens doors.
Factual error2: Just because they hunt in packs, velociraptors aren't wolves. And just because they are biped, they aren't tyrannosaurs rex either. Give this amazing predator some respect. This is how they would've hunted. In other words, getting close to the prey, leaping high and sinking those famous "sickle claws" into the throat and bleeding the prey to death would've been the strategy.
And the ambush would be like nothing that you get to see on Animal planet. The metre-tall biped weighing around 45 kgs would run towards you flapping its feather-covered wings like a bird to get a lift, and after it gets sufficinet lift, it would kick the ground hard wiht its hind legs, jump into the air flapping its wings and using its tail for steering and sink its claws into your throat.
Michael Crichton, Steven Speilberg - are you listening?
You bring back a species that has been extinct for 65 million years and one that has brains the size of a potato, and bang - there they are, opening doors with hands.
Factual error1: Velocirapors are therapods, closely related to modern birds and their shoulder joins allow only one type of movement of limbs - sideways, like that of a bird. Not up and down, the way that one opens doors.
Factual error2: Just because they hunt in packs, velociraptors aren't wolves. And just because they are biped, they aren't tyrannosaurs rex either. Give this amazing predator some respect. This is how they would've hunted. In other words, getting close to the prey, leaping high and sinking those famous "sickle claws" into the throat and bleeding the prey to death would've been the strategy.
And the ambush would be like nothing that you get to see on Animal planet. The metre-tall biped weighing around 45 kgs would run towards you flapping its feather-covered wings like a bird to get a lift, and after it gets sufficinet lift, it would kick the ground hard wiht its hind legs, jump into the air flapping its wings and using its tail for steering and sink its claws into your throat.
Michael Crichton, Steven Speilberg - are you listening?
Not enough money, not enough sex and not enough dreams - a rather insipid way to live. But relax, life isn't as cruel as this. You just need to look around. It gives you amazing visual treats, like this image of a tyrannousaurus-spinosaurus fight.
Ya, this wasn't nature's gift, by any chance. Spinosaurus lived in the early Cretaceous period, 95 to 93 million years ago in the African continet and T-rex lived in the last stage of the Cretaceous period, 65 – 66 million years ago in the Americal continent. But then, the current continents did not make sense 65 million years ago. This picture came from Universal Studios. But, what the heck. Sit bacl and enjoy.
Ya, this wasn't nature's gift, by any chance. Spinosaurus lived in the early Cretaceous period, 95 to 93 million years ago in the African continet and T-rex lived in the last stage of the Cretaceous period, 65 – 66 million years ago in the Americal continent. But then, the current continents did not make sense 65 million years ago. This picture came from Universal Studios. But, what the heck. Sit bacl and enjoy.
Evolution rocks
In 1991, Michael Crichton broke my heart.
It was love at first sight. Thanks to Eveready, I got two free tickets to the premiere show of Jurassic Park. Later, when I managed to get hold of the book, I fell in love with the fast, agile and intelligent velociraptors and it continued till the time I read that velociraptors were not 2 metres tall as the book says, but the size of a dog and that the encephalisation quotient of a velociraptor is about the same as that of an ostrich. I never forgave Michael Crichton for that.
Later, YoungWorld had an article on whales, and it said that the whales were driven to the oceans by dinosaurs. It took me 10 long years to get the science right, and here it is.
Whales came into picture after the dinosaurs went extinct. This was how their ancestors looked like 40 million years back- about the size of a dog.
Pakicetus
After a few millions years of semi-aquatic lifestyle, they looked like a cross between a crocodile and a platypus.
Remingtonocetus
The first primitive whales looked like this.
Basilosaurus>
Imagine, little old pakicetus giving rise to the largest animal the earth ever saw.
Seriously, evolution rocks.
More on whale evolution here
It was love at first sight. Thanks to Eveready, I got two free tickets to the premiere show of Jurassic Park. Later, when I managed to get hold of the book, I fell in love with the fast, agile and intelligent velociraptors and it continued till the time I read that velociraptors were not 2 metres tall as the book says, but the size of a dog and that the encephalisation quotient of a velociraptor is about the same as that of an ostrich. I never forgave Michael Crichton for that.
Later, YoungWorld had an article on whales, and it said that the whales were driven to the oceans by dinosaurs. It took me 10 long years to get the science right, and here it is.
Whales came into picture after the dinosaurs went extinct. This was how their ancestors looked like 40 million years back- about the size of a dog.
Pakicetus
After a few millions years of semi-aquatic lifestyle, they looked like a cross between a crocodile and a platypus.
Remingtonocetus
The first primitive whales looked like this.
Basilosaurus>Imagine, little old pakicetus giving rise to the largest animal the earth ever saw.
Seriously, evolution rocks.
More on whale evolution here
Tuesday, October 11, 2005
History's most famous embrace
This is an artist's reconstruction of history's most famous embrace - a hunt from the dinosaur era captured forever as a fossil.
The deadly velociraptor, a maniraptorian theropod, one of the most efficient predators the world has seen- with its characteristic sickle-claw is hunting a protoceratops, a ceratopsian with a huge beaked head. The velociraptor has driven its claws into the neck of the protoceratops, and inturn, the protoceratops has broken the right arm of the velociraptor.
The hunter and the hunted were caught unaware when a sandstorm suddenly descended upon them, forever burying them under tons of sand that eventually fossilised the fight.
This is the amazing fossil.
You can distinctly make out the distincly bird-like neck of the velociraptor and the ceratopsian head.
The deadly velociraptor, a maniraptorian theropod, one of the most efficient predators the world has seen- with its characteristic sickle-claw is hunting a protoceratops, a ceratopsian with a huge beaked head. The velociraptor has driven its claws into the neck of the protoceratops, and inturn, the protoceratops has broken the right arm of the velociraptor.
The hunter and the hunted were caught unaware when a sandstorm suddenly descended upon them, forever burying them under tons of sand that eventually fossilised the fight.
This is the amazing fossil.
You can distinctly make out the distincly bird-like neck of the velociraptor and the ceratopsian head.
Life, or something like it., 5
I look around me and I see a lot of passion. I see dreams, dedication and perseverance. I see ambition, greed and potential. I see those traits that I don't find in me. I see patterns. I see predictability, conservatism and fear. I see well-defined thought processes, their boundaries, and in the void beyond the boundaries, I see sanctity and sacrilege. I see the future, not mine. I see unviolated boundaries and my anguish.
Ramanand Sagar and the sensex boom
Most of us who were born in the eighties knew that Ramanand Sagar wrote and directed Ramayan. Valmiki? Who is he? Had it not been for Ramanand Sagar, most of us would be of the opinion that Ramayan was the name of a street-side sweet shop.
In addition to having blurred the distinction between history and mythology, this man was also, in a huge way, responsible for the rise of Hindu Nationalism and subsequently, the concept of Hindutva in modern India.
In January 1987, the Indian government began broadcasting a Hindu epic in serial form, the Ramayan, to nationwide audiences on a regular basis. This violated a decades-old taboo on religious partisanship, and Hindu nationalists made the most of th e opportunity.
The rise of the Bharatiya Janata Party, a right of centre party from the shadows of the rabidly right wing RSS/VHP parivar that harped on the golden age of hinduism potrayed in these ramanand sagar serials had a two pronged effect on the public - it gave the audience a false image of the putative glory of the past and instilling a feeling of current inadequacy and poverty, and to the politicians, it, for perhaps the first time, gave the right wing a launchpad to the throne.
Thanks to Ramanad Sagar, it happened in 2005. Might've taken a little longer otherwise. Or perhaps not come at all.
In addition to having blurred the distinction between history and mythology, this man was also, in a huge way, responsible for the rise of Hindu Nationalism and subsequently, the concept of Hindutva in modern India.
In January 1987, the Indian government began broadcasting a Hindu epic in serial form, the Ramayan, to nationwide audiences on a regular basis. This violated a decades-old taboo on religious partisanship, and Hindu nationalists made the most of th e opportunity.
The rise of the Bharatiya Janata Party, a right of centre party from the shadows of the rabidly right wing RSS/VHP parivar that harped on the golden age of hinduism potrayed in these ramanand sagar serials had a two pronged effect on the public - it gave the audience a false image of the putative glory of the past and instilling a feeling of current inadequacy and poverty, and to the politicians, it, for perhaps the first time, gave the right wing a launchpad to the throne.
Thanks to Ramanad Sagar, it happened in 2005. Might've taken a little longer otherwise. Or perhaps not come at all.
Life, or something like it., 4
I looked into the eyes of the adolescent boy who came to clean my table after breakfast: my gluttonous breakfast. At that moment, I understood why he would be a communist, and later I realised why I am not.
Photo of two children collecting water to drink from somebody's tank overflow.
Photo of two children collecting water to drink from somebody's tank overflow.
Monday, October 10, 2005
An AYM GRAMD from IIT
Dear Friends,
Here is a personal experience, as well as a moment of national pride, which I want to share with you. Hope you find it worth the time you put in reading it :
"In the middle of 1965 India-Pakistan war, US govt - then a close friend of Pakistan - threatened India with stopping food-aid (remember "PL-480"?). For a food deficient India this threat was serious and humiliating. So much so that in the middle of war, Prime Minister (Late) Lal Bahadur Shastri went to Ram Leela Grounds in Delhi and appealed to each Indian to observe one-meal-fast every week to answer the American threat. As a school boy, I joined those millions who responded to Shastri ji's call. I continued the fast even when the war was over and India became self sufficient in food. Hurt deep by the national humiliation suffered at the hands of the US govt, I had vowed
to stop my weekly fast only when India starts giving aid to USA.
It took just 40 years. Last week THE day arrived. When Indian ambassador in Washington DC handed over a cheque of US$ 50 million to the US govt, two plane loads of food, medical aid and other relief materials were waiting to fly to the USA. Time to break the fast? With no bad feeling about the USA, and good wishes for the Katrina victims, this humble Indian feels proud of the distance India has covered in 40 years. Let's celebrate a New India!"
- Vijay Kranti.
Without taking away the credit from India's achievements, I'd like to point out the following:
- It is EXTREMELY difficult for a nation of this size and population to not have covered this distance in 40 years. I mean, you should've been extremely talented as a finance minister to have stopped the growth of a nation whose GDP was 40 billion$ in 1947. North Korea and Russia manged to achieve it nevertheless
- Outsourcing was not an Indian invention. Had it not been for some smart guy sitting in Palo Alto, we would never have( a cautious never ) figured out outsourcing by oruselves.
Stop the mindless jingoism and ride the new economic wave.
Did you know...
That up until the time humans colonised New Zealand(Maoris, a thousand years ago), the only mammals in NewZeland were a few bats and that all the ecological niches occupied by deer, zebra, lion, hyena and crocoidle were occupied by birds(and a few by reptiles)?
Man, what would I not give to see such an ecosystem(I wouldn't give this up for sure.
Below is a scale model of Moa, the dominant herbivore in the New Zealand eco system and to the right is the scale image of a Haast eagle attacking Moas. A truly majestic sight.
P.S: Image souce: Wikipedia
Had dinosaurs not been wiped out and had intelligent life descended from dinosaurs, it would have been a huge pity for one simple reason. Dinosaurs didn't have extenal genitals and hence dinosauroids couldn't have masturbated :)
Boy, that's a pity....
Man, what would I not give to see such an ecosystem(I wouldn't give this up for sure.
Below is a scale model of Moa, the dominant herbivore in the New Zealand eco system and to the right is the scale image of a Haast eagle attacking Moas. A truly majestic sight.
P.S: Image souce: Wikipedia
Had dinosaurs not been wiped out and had intelligent life descended from dinosaurs, it would have been a huge pity for one simple reason. Dinosaurs didn't have extenal genitals and hence dinosauroids couldn't have masturbated :)
Boy, that's a pity....
Life, or something like it.
I wince, seeing the spreading ink blot on paper: the birth of a baby blue universe, a miniature creation centred on the tip of the stylish upward stroke at the end of e, completing hope. I must have gone into one of my tangential thought processes again.
My overpaid psychiatrist would take a deep breath, cross his legs, loosen down his shoulders and comment that this stylish upward stroke signifies an unhappy childhood. He'd go on to suggest that I get laid and would slyly remark that he could arrange for it.
I used to belive in psychiatrists until I met one. But that doesn't mean anything. I used to believe in conspiracy theories, of reptiloids taking over the world, creation, patriotism, scruples, morals, fidelty, god, God and my science teacher. I no longer do. I used to believe in right and wrong, life on mars, aliens, purpose in life and in myself. I no longer do.
I believed in my science teacher till the time she told me that eclipses aren't caused by giant snakes gobbling up the sun, like my mom, in her infinite wisdom had taught me, but rather by shadows, in much the same way that my mentally retarded neighbour who pees in his pants casts barking dogs on the wall.
I believed in God till I had an accident. I believed in my psychiatrist till he told me that there was nothing wrong with me. I believed in my mom till she told me that I had certain duties to fulfil in life.
What is it then that I believe in? Well, I believe in dinosaus, and yes, that's about it. Here I am, all of twenty five years old, and all that I believe in this wretched existence are things, the last of which died 65 million years back, some of them sporting funky plumages.
I believed in creation till I stumbled onto anthropic principle. I believed in the anthropic principle till I embraced nihilism. I believed in nihilism till I understood nihilism, and now, all that's left are the dinosaurs. Fossils, the size of three-storeyed buildings stand tall amidsr the carcasses of my past beliefs - little independent conscious beliefs that lived, some ephemeral, some for a while, but all of them discarnate, like a ball of light thats light all the way down and out at the other end, incorporeal entities, but somehow sometimes, some of these spectral entities manage to eke out lesser incorporals adding to the pile of bodiless carcasses, a graveyard of dead beliefs at the centre of which lies the equally tenuous gallimimus fossil, letting out triumphant shouts that nobody listens to anyway.
My overpaid psychiatrist would take a deep breath, cross his legs, loosen down his shoulders and comment that this stylish upward stroke signifies an unhappy childhood. He'd go on to suggest that I get laid and would slyly remark that he could arrange for it.
I used to belive in psychiatrists until I met one. But that doesn't mean anything. I used to believe in conspiracy theories, of reptiloids taking over the world, creation, patriotism, scruples, morals, fidelty, god, God and my science teacher. I no longer do. I used to believe in right and wrong, life on mars, aliens, purpose in life and in myself. I no longer do.
I believed in my science teacher till the time she told me that eclipses aren't caused by giant snakes gobbling up the sun, like my mom, in her infinite wisdom had taught me, but rather by shadows, in much the same way that my mentally retarded neighbour who pees in his pants casts barking dogs on the wall.
I believed in God till I had an accident. I believed in my psychiatrist till he told me that there was nothing wrong with me. I believed in my mom till she told me that I had certain duties to fulfil in life.
What is it then that I believe in? Well, I believe in dinosaus, and yes, that's about it. Here I am, all of twenty five years old, and all that I believe in this wretched existence are things, the last of which died 65 million years back, some of them sporting funky plumages.
I believed in creation till I stumbled onto anthropic principle. I believed in the anthropic principle till I embraced nihilism. I believed in nihilism till I understood nihilism, and now, all that's left are the dinosaurs. Fossils, the size of three-storeyed buildings stand tall amidsr the carcasses of my past beliefs - little independent conscious beliefs that lived, some ephemeral, some for a while, but all of them discarnate, like a ball of light thats light all the way down and out at the other end, incorporeal entities, but somehow sometimes, some of these spectral entities manage to eke out lesser incorporals adding to the pile of bodiless carcasses, a graveyard of dead beliefs at the centre of which lies the equally tenuous gallimimus fossil, letting out triumphant shouts that nobody listens to anyway.
Life, or something like it., II
For quite sometime now, I have been flattering myself. I am my parents' thought frankenstein; I am society's big bad parasite; I am this anti-social misanthrope, sporting a fashionable liberal scorn and an attitude of shying away from solutions.
It has worked well with me. I have, at various instances, been termed as being unsocial, and being unfit for any role in the family or in society. Little do my parents realise that this is what I've been working towards, consciously or otherwise.
My beliefs are conjuring acts, of beliefs coming into existence where none existed, and where there isn't a need for one. They don't appear to fill in the created vacuum; they appear to create a vacuum. Their appearance and the subsequent hasty abandoning have become the defining aspect of my life.
Earthquake strike South Asia. 30,000 feared dead
I don't know what it is to be in an earthquake. I don't know what it means to be struck down unexpectedly. I don't know what losing my house means to me. The worst thing that happened to me was my first accident. First accidents have a strange and callous way of reminding you of your primal fears. I knew I had to cry, but didn't know why. I knew this was a big moment, but couldn't quite say how.
It has worked well with me. I have, at various instances, been termed as being unsocial, and being unfit for any role in the family or in society. Little do my parents realise that this is what I've been working towards, consciously or otherwise.
My beliefs are conjuring acts, of beliefs coming into existence where none existed, and where there isn't a need for one. They don't appear to fill in the created vacuum; they appear to create a vacuum. Their appearance and the subsequent hasty abandoning have become the defining aspect of my life.
Earthquake strike South Asia. 30,000 feared dead
I don't know what it is to be in an earthquake. I don't know what it means to be struck down unexpectedly. I don't know what losing my house means to me. The worst thing that happened to me was my first accident. First accidents have a strange and callous way of reminding you of your primal fears. I knew I had to cry, but didn't know why. I knew this was a big moment, but couldn't quite say how.
Life, or something like it., 3
I love to indulge myself, and these days I do it by reading other peoples' blogs. I get a high reading terrible blogs on silly everyday incidents with non-existent sense of humour, and seeing that 40 people are pea-brains enough to like it and appreciate it.
This is one of the reasons why I want to nuke mylapore
The RavingAtheist has some very powerful logical proofs on the non-existence of god.
First, there is no God. In fact, all definitions of the word "God" are either self-contradictory, incoherent, meaningless or refuted by empirical, scientific evidence. Although the nature of the disproof will necessarily vary with the god under review, I will usually be raving against the modern monotheistic (or triune) Judeo-Christian-Islamic God, having (in various permutations) the characteristics of being, conscious, all-powerful (omnipotent), all-knowing (omniscient), all-good (omnibenevolent), immaterial, transcendent. immutable, immortal, infinite, omnipresent, disembodied and eternal.
Such a god is as much a contradiction in terms as a square circle, and thus logically impossible, for numerous reasons including the following:
1) Omnipotence is impossible because God would, at a minimum, be unable to limit his powers, e.g., make a stone he cannot lift; if he could make such a stone, then his inability to lift it would defeat his omnipotence;
2) God's omnipotence conflicts with his omniscience, because if God knows everything that is going to happen in advance, he cannot do anything in the present; he must simply watch the future unfold as previously foreseen, because changing anything would falsify his prior belief concerning the future;
3) God's omnipotence precludes him from having knowledge of any sensations or emotions associated with weakness, e.g., fear, frustration, despair, sickness, etc., and thus conflicts with him omniscience;
4) God's omniscience precludes him from having knowledge of any emotions associated with surprise or anticipation, and thus conflicts with itself;
5) God's omniscience conflicts with his disembodiedness, since a being without a body could not know how to drive, swim, or perform any activity associated with having a body;
6) God's omniscience conflicts with his omnibenevolence, since a morally perfect god could not have knowledge of feelings of hate, lust, or envy, or cruelty, etc.
7) God's omniscience and omnipotence conflict with his omnibenevolence, since a god who could prevent evil would do so unless he were unable to do so or unaware of the evil.
Very powerful arguments, I must say. I wonder why students are still taught religion in school. When I was in school, we had a subject called "Moral Education" till 6th standard. There were various stories and anectodes on god. One funny story went such:
There was a man who wanted to see if God really existed and so he raised his son w/o external influneces. He taught him history, mathematics, biology and physcis, all the while not mentioning one word about god. A few years later, he caught his son kneeling in the ground and praying. The son realised that someone must have created them and that the creator should've been a benovelant almighty god.
Nobody tries to teach me theism at 25. Am missing all the fun.
This is one of the reasons why I want to nuke mylapore
The RavingAtheist has some very powerful logical proofs on the non-existence of god.
First, there is no God. In fact, all definitions of the word "God" are either self-contradictory, incoherent, meaningless or refuted by empirical, scientific evidence. Although the nature of the disproof will necessarily vary with the god under review, I will usually be raving against the modern monotheistic (or triune) Judeo-Christian-Islamic God, having (in various permutations) the characteristics of being, conscious, all-powerful (omnipotent), all-knowing (omniscient), all-good (omnibenevolent), immaterial, transcendent. immutable, immortal, infinite, omnipresent, disembodied and eternal.
Such a god is as much a contradiction in terms as a square circle, and thus logically impossible, for numerous reasons including the following:
1) Omnipotence is impossible because God would, at a minimum, be unable to limit his powers, e.g., make a stone he cannot lift; if he could make such a stone, then his inability to lift it would defeat his omnipotence;
2) God's omnipotence conflicts with his omniscience, because if God knows everything that is going to happen in advance, he cannot do anything in the present; he must simply watch the future unfold as previously foreseen, because changing anything would falsify his prior belief concerning the future;
3) God's omnipotence precludes him from having knowledge of any sensations or emotions associated with weakness, e.g., fear, frustration, despair, sickness, etc., and thus conflicts with him omniscience;
4) God's omniscience precludes him from having knowledge of any emotions associated with surprise or anticipation, and thus conflicts with itself;
5) God's omniscience conflicts with his disembodiedness, since a being without a body could not know how to drive, swim, or perform any activity associated with having a body;
6) God's omniscience conflicts with his omnibenevolence, since a morally perfect god could not have knowledge of feelings of hate, lust, or envy, or cruelty, etc.
7) God's omniscience and omnipotence conflict with his omnibenevolence, since a god who could prevent evil would do so unless he were unable to do so or unaware of the evil.
Very powerful arguments, I must say. I wonder why students are still taught religion in school. When I was in school, we had a subject called "Moral Education" till 6th standard. There were various stories and anectodes on god. One funny story went such:
There was a man who wanted to see if God really existed and so he raised his son w/o external influneces. He taught him history, mathematics, biology and physcis, all the while not mentioning one word about god. A few years later, he caught his son kneeling in the ground and praying. The son realised that someone must have created them and that the creator should've been a benovelant almighty god.
Nobody tries to teach me theism at 25. Am missing all the fun.
Nuke Mylapore contd..
A couple of years back, someone I knew then came over to me and proudly announced that s/he has an argument with one of her friends and convinced her that north indians did not have any culture at all. Not surpisingly, s/he was from Mylapore, and no points for guessing who that person was.
Nuke Mylapore campaign
I am a simple man. I have few dreams, fewer ambitions and no expectations from life. There is nothing that would give me the satisfaction of having satisfied the purpose of my life. Well, almost.
If there is one thing that would give me immense happiness, it is nuking Mylapore. Imagine taking a helicopter with a 0.5Megaton plutonium bomb and dropping it over Mylapore from a height of 6000m, listening to "Für Elise" and watching it burn to ashes. THAT, my friend, is what satisfaction would feel like.
On a tangential note, did you know that as of 27 November 2003, no European company - except one - can use the first 9 notes from Beethoven's beautiful melody anymore?A Dutch trademark agency ShieldMark succesfully claimed the rights on the first nine notes of "Für Elise".
Weird? Yes, but not as wierd as the inhabitants of this land - Mylapore.
To be continued..
P.S: That's me, happily watching mthe mushroom cloud over mylapore :)
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